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A friend is someone who understands your past,

believes in your future

and accepts you just the way you are.  

I was having my morning coffee the other day and one of the “morning shows” just happened to be on the TV.  Have you noticed since COVID how much complaining many of the TV personalities do?  When did it come into vogue to complain so bitterly about “first world problems”?  When did complaining begin to occupy and fixate our conversations both on media and in social networking online?  

I guess why I find it so odd, is because many people are actually suffering from job losses, social isolation, mental health breakdowns, sickness, grief, homelessness, bankruptcy and other major traumas attributed to the COVID-19 Pandemic.  It’s why I can’t muster a lot of sympathy for those, for example, complaining about not being able to go down south this winter, gather with large groups in their homes or at restaurants, go to their favorite ski resort or have their family just hop on a plane to come and visit.  

This doesn’t mean I don’t take things like COVID fatigue, loneliness and depression seriously.  Some people are paying an emotional and spiritual price because of this pandemic.  What makes the difference between those who are coping pretty well and those who are struggling?   In my opinion, people who are coping well talk about their faith, their garden, their ability to walk in nature, to engage in COVID appropriate sporting activities, or to have a hobby or activity that engages them.  But the one thing they all have in common is at least one friendship.   

I think that it is much easier to live through, and cope with the stress associated with any kind of trauma (including a pandemic) if one has a friend.  You don’t need a lot of friends but life is easier if you have at least one person you can count as a friend.  Friends are different from other relationships.  It’s good if we have loving relationships with spouses, children, siblings and parents, but those relationships are different than friendships.  

I always like to think of the disciples as Jesus’ friends and I think its kind of cool that this is who he chose to help him in his ministry.  Although their work was serious, they experienced fun times travelling together and sharing a common meal – they were good friends!  

I really like the definition of friendship at the beginning of this blog and I would like to add this quote that a friend sent me not so long ago.

A friend comforts you when you require comforting,

mourns with you when you are mourning,

bears your burdens to lighten your load,

believes in you, and most importantly,  

SHOWS up and STANDS beside you

regardless of your tribulations and afflictions.  

One of my best friends lives back in Alberta. We talk on the phone regularly.  He’s a good listener – he never blames, never judges and doesn’t give advice unless I’m looking for it.  Hopefully, I do the same for him.  Luckily, we can both laugh at the absurdities of life for we both have had challenges along the way.  We enjoy each other’s company and I always feel better after talking to him – even if I just phoned to let him know that flowers are blooming on the West Coast while Alberta is experiencing an epic blizzard!  

So, if you have a friend during these trying times you are blessed.  Try not to fixate on the inconveniences of a pandemic but feel compassion for those who are truly suffering, be grateful for all the positive things in your life, and most importantly, if you know someone who needs a friend, reach out.  You’ll both be rewarded in so many ways!  

Amen!