On Being Family

On Being Family
Whether Born into or Chosen, You gotta love ‘em!

Some days I am just so proud to be United Church and this Sunday’s celebration of Christian Family Sunday is one of them! Although many of us are still connected to the traditional nuclear family of Mother, Father and children and choose to honour our Mothers this coming Sunday, it leaves a great swath of our society standing on the margins wondering; what about me?

What about the child who has two dads or two moms or no mom at all? What about adults that for whatever reason have an estranged or difficult relationship with their mother? What if it is just complicated? So many families today have birth parents, step parents and interesting extended families. Carol and I are part of that interesting family phenomena. Every once in awhile someone asks me how I can have 4 step-step greatgrandchildren. It’s complicated. But to all of the grandchildren and great-grandchildren, I’m just Papa. And to know that they are loved is enough!

I think most of us have had significant people in our lives that have contributed to who we are. In my life my grandmother, my older sister, my brother-in-law, a youth worker with ISCF, and even mentors as an adult, made a huge difference to my faith and self-worth. They are all part of who I am and that makes them family – so how great to celebrate that!

I was doing some course work a few years ago and one of the workshops was facilitated by a child psychologist discussing what a huge difference the church could make in the life of a child. Although many of us were lucky enough to have a village to help form our faith and who we are as humans, he emphasized a point that has stuck with me. One adult who believes in a child and accepts and loves them unconditionally, just as they are, can make the difference between a child thriving and failing.

Children can survive very difficult and chaotic families if there is one person who believes in them. It can be a teacher, a sports coach, a Sunday school teacher, a youth leader, a minister, an aunt, an uncle, a grandparent or other friend, neighbour or family member. It doesn’t matter so much who they are but that they care, they believe in, and love this child.

Comox United Church is well positioned to make a difference in so many children’s lives. Because we are an Affirming Church it gives us an opportunity to reach out to young people who are struggling with gender identity, sexual orientation or just fitting in because of mental health, cognitive or behavioural issues. We could be that village or we could be that one person that makes a difference to that child who might be considering taking drugs or harming themselves. Jesus calls out to us to love all children but especially those who live on the fringes and margins of our society. How will we answer that call in the days to come?

So on this Sunday let’s be proud to be United Church, let’s give thanks for all the people who helped us grow in faith and contributed to our becoming who we are, let us be appreciative if we had a village surrounding us but let us be truly grateful for that one person who makes a difference. May your family, whether by birth or by choice, be remembered and honoured on this special Sunday, set aside to celebrate ALL FAMILIES!

Amen